Please refrain from sharing or posting your terrible B squad
stories- no offense, but this is a positive post not meant to entice people to
share the opposite experience but to enjoy that someone had a positive one, and
to think about how you can help make your kid’s B squad experience (if they
have one) a positive one.
Playing on the B squad of a team (in this case basketball)
means you most likely won’t play much or at all. It means you will come to every
practice and give it your all- and still not play much or at all. Most kids who
are on a B squad know why they are on the B squad, they aren’t as good as the A
squad- pretty simple. Most kids know that right after try outs and are just
happy to have made the team (aka my daughter)- the problem usually lies with
the parents (shocking, I know) and their perception of how good their kid is at
that particular sport, but that’s not the point of this story. This story is about what you (aka the kid,
and the parent) can learn about being on the “B” team.
I work with some of the most talented business students in
the country. Over the past several years, when meeting with sophomores, a
common story is how when they came to Kelley as a freshman, they got a little
wake up call. What? You mean I am not the only high school student who excelled
at everything? I was the bomb in high
school- now I am just a bomb among many bombs? Awe…it is so cute when they get
this wake up call, because the flash of reality is both fun to watch but also a
moment of great maturity for them. Guess
what? You won’t always be the shining star. There will be times when you are
going to be in a support role (see where I am going with this?) It does not
mean you are not a leader or a star in your own right if you aren't always the
one calling the shots or in the limelight.
To me, serving in a support role is a major component of
humility. Some people have a hard time being in a support role and trying not
to give themselves some kind of billing. The best support people just do their
“job” and don’t expect or even necessarily want recognition. So that bench
warmer “nomenclature” that has a negative feel for some people, is really a
great opportunity to look at things differently (here is the disclaimer- I know
there are kids who have been on the bench who maybe don’t deserve to be there-
this is where the crappy coach stories come in, but nevertheless there are still some
life lessons to be taught and learned that will benefit players years down the
road.)
You know what a future employer of your child would want to
hear about their B squad days? I stuck with it. I came to every practice not
expecting to play in the games, but expecting to help my team get stronger. I
cheered and got water bottles for the starters. During time outs I got off the
bench and went to the huddle. (And my
mom only had to wash my uniform twice during the season, so that made her
happy.) I am someone you can count on. I am someone who will come to work with the same
positive attitude: Every. Single. Day.
Not a bad employee to have, huh?
My daughter has been a starter in one sport and a
bench warmer on others. I am proud of both equally because of how she handles
herself in both roles- the same. She
gets it- maybe because we have talked about it, and (another disclaimer) we
have had great coaches, parents, and teammates through this experience- all the
stars aligned in this scenario- that doesn't always happen. If it doesn't, then you have to fill those stars in.
As Flo (yes, "Progressive Insurance Flo") says, “Sprinkles are for winners”. It’s important for kids to know, some days
will be sprinkle-less, and that quite simply is life. You can still be a star
minus the sprinkles.
